Missoni Madness

Missoni for Target ad

As I continue to search for a job, I'm trying to enjoy the benefits life affords me righ now:  leisurely breakfasts of eggs and French press over the Wall Street Journal, a vinyassa flow class at noon, catching "Anderson" at the 4 o'clock hour.... and yesterday it was the ability to dedicate the morning to shopping the new Missoni for Target line.

shefinds.com

I had set my alarm with a plan to arrive to the Target shopping center at 7:55am, however morning traffic had me pulling in at 8:12AM.  I still thought my strategy was perfect; there couldn't possibly be that many overly eager Virginia Beach shoppers whose first stop would be Target on a Tuesday morning.  I was sorely mistaken.  As the glass doors slid open, the Missoni displays immediately came into view.  There they were:  the clothes, the patterns, the styles that I'd seen on TV, in my September Vogue, and online the past few weeks... and it was swarming with women and their red shopping carts piled high with the recognizable zig zag prints.  Adrenaline rushed, my fingers clamped down on a cart, arms stiffened.  I strode over to join the other hoarders on my Missoni mission.

My schooling from New York sample sales combined with my competitive streak from high school sports swept over me the minute I began sliding the plastic hangers across the racks.  Smalls, smalls, where were all the smalls?  Ok if there wasn't a small to be found, go for the XS, or the M, really whatever is there, put it in the cart and keep moving.  Then it was across the glimmering floor to the shoe display with quite a limited style selection.  But it didn't matter, just find your size.  Only on display for 20 minutes, the shoe shelves looked like a mini Irene has just blown through.  Many boxes were mismatched to the shoes sizes and elastic tag holders were tangled around two and even three abandoned pairs.  A bewildered sales associate wheeled up a cart of boxes letting us know she had a few more sizes from the back, but before unpacking, she became distracted by two women in the lingerie section bickering over who the size small Missoni bathrobe belonged to.  The hesistant shoppers circled for a few fleeting moments, and then the feeding frenzy that would rival any Shark Week scene broke out.   And I admit, I started it.  I thought I'd just peeked into one of the big cardboard boxes to seek that size 10 pump but once another shark smelled the blood, that was it.  Boxes were snatched, sizes called out, flats, pumps, rain boots went from one sweaty hand to the next.  We bargained and exchanged like we were standing on the floor of Wall Street.

the two pairs I purchased

And after the three pairs of size 10 shoes were safely ensconced in my cart, I began a full "supermarket sweep," more like a mad dash, around the store, locating the other sections where that iconic print surely was to be found.  Home accessories, tabletop, office.  I hit them all, one after another, piling them up, trying not to make eye contact with the competition.  I even flew by the bike displays, scanning for that coveted $400 beauty, but it wasn't there.  Screeching to a halt for a few Missoni hair barretts and a headband, just for good measure, I realized it was over.  I was back to where I started only 28 minutes ago.  I wheeled my booty back to the fitting rooms, swiping a few coveted size smalls off the return rack on the way in.  The woman staffing the desk didn't even ask how many articles of clothing I had.  There wasn't a number in her plastic stack that would accommodate my plunder.

already picked over tabletop items at my Target

my favorite tabletop items:  espresso sets

espresso sets and silver cocktail shakers

I locked myself into the fitting room and sat down to take a deep breath, surveying the colorful piles.  After I tried on every garment, shoe, and accessory hoarded, I sorted through the numerous other items, putting many of the home decor and tabletop pieces back where I had found them.  I guess I really didn't need that twin bed sheet set when I only own a queen.   Surrendering some of my stash was necessary but slightly painful.  Maxing a credit card at Bergdorf might be excusable, but a Tuesday morning at the local Target?  I didn't want to take my chances.

I exited the store into the morning sun at exactly 9:07AM.  Smiling, I clutched my five plastic bulls eye bags, the zig zags clearly visible for all the late comers staring at the near empty racks to see.  Victory.

Here are a few pictures of my full Target take.

P.S. The Missoni for Target website at target.com was still down at 10pm last night when I completed this post.  Apparently it just couldn't handle the volume of Missoni devotees, the fashionistas, the frugalistas who were locked out nearly all day.